Talking about bathrooms is something I would do because it's so pedestrian of a topic that after 10 minutes of me talking about stalls versus urinals people would change the subject and not want to hear how if the gas station men's room is occupied and the women's room isn't, I will use the lady's room.

I typically preferred the lady's room at my former place of employment because it was a delight to the senses. The men's room was another story, way off in the press room, ink stained and a horrible assault to the senses.

So, yes, given the choice between a men's room and lady's room, if unoccupied, I'm taking the lady's room.

When I joined in the morning breakfast club at Oscar's earlier this week someone asked me if my women's room policy would apply to venues like football stadiums and whatnot. My answer at that moment was yes, but in retrospect it would be probably not because a lot of pre-planning would have to come along with going into a situation like that, something on par with planning the Normandy invasion.

It would be like the time recently I walked into the Kirkwood Adams lady's room because the way the place is laid out it's hard to see the signs immediately. There were women in the women's room and had I known beforehand I was walking in the women's room I would have given some type of warning that a man was coming through, much like the warning we shouted in college if we knew a woman was in our dorm wing. It was typically someone's mother visiting and not a Christy Brinkley type we would eagerly want to invite into our rooms for milk and cookies.

While I'm being dumb in this column I understand what the underlying issue is in why the general assembly called a special session to talk about bathrooms and the underlying issue is something of which my interest is at best neutral.

I don't care what your orientation is if you treat me nice and when it comes to the call of nature I'm not trying to figure out whether you're a man who once was a woman or the other way around because, as my grandmother often said, when you got to go, you got to go.

So, yeah, our lawmakers called a special session to talk about bathrooms and it's pretty much a shame.

I might feel different if they called a special session to talk about my bathroom because I really could stand a new sink and could stand to have some work done on my permanent shower curtain rod. I wouldn't mind having a built-in towel steamer for my shaving ritual, which leaves my skin remarkably fresh and smooth. I'm sure there's some grant funds out there for that kind of stuff because it seems to me people can get grants for the weirdest things these days.

Point is, our lawmakers actually sat down in Raleigh for a special session on bathrooms and to usurp the power of local government to address issues as they see fit.

It could have very well been a vote to address the sale of medicinal marijuana in the city of Charlotte, instead it happened to be about gender discrimination and bathrooms.

Instead of addressing economic development issues which could aid our immediate area in how to spur job growth, our lawmakers are talking about bathrooms and not what they can do to help us land something big like the CSX Intermodal Terminal, which county commissioners and Roanoke Rapids City Council have both backed.

The Charlotte “bathroom issue” was solely a local issue in which Raleigh stuck its nose into and you know what can happen when stick your nose in a bathroom, you're libel to walk away offended.

State lawmakers set a dangerous precedent sticking their collective noses where they don't belong because next time it could be something done on a local scale not involving bathrooms — it could be rescinding a critical ordinance to allow for growth in rural areas so local governments, already hurting from funds taken away by the state, are going to have be more vigilant than ever against our legislators calling for special sessions to redo something local boards did in good faith.

That said, it still confuses me they would call such a session and if they're going to be that intrusive, at least give me a towel steamer so my face will remain remarkably fresh and smooth. — Lance Martin